Childhood Stories Yu Yu Style
by Ibble Ibble
Summary: Stories like 'Goldilocks' retold with the characters from Yu Yu Hakusho. Flames used for toasting marshmellows! Was taken down, but it is fixed!
1. RedILocks and the Three Bears

Ibble Ibble: I don't own anything, except a box.

**Red-ilocks and the Three Bears**

Ibble Ibble handed everyone his or her parts in the play.

"Why am I 'Red-ilocks'?" Kurama asked.

"The almighty authoress said so." Yusuke said.

"I don't look like a little bear." Hiei said.

Kuwabara said, "I don't look like a girl bear."

"I get to be narrator, director-" Ibble Ibble began.

"We know!" Everyone yelled.

"Once upon a time, a _girl _named-" Ibble Ibble began.

"Not girl." Kurama said.

"HN. That was walking home came to the wrong house. Earlier that morning…"

Nothing happened.

"**EARLIER THAT MORNING…"**

Nothing happened again.

"Come on already!"

The three bears got on the stage.

"Would you like some porridge? Kuwabara said in a high voice.

"HN." Hiei said.

"**Hiei!" **Ibble Ibble said.

"Yes mama." Hiei said.

"Yes dear." Yusuke said.

Porridge is set on the table.

"Oh my, mine is too hot." Hiei said quietly.

"LOUDER!"

"Oh my, mine is too hot." He said even softer.

"Would you like to be acquainted with **The Evil Monster Who Eats Short Three Eyed Demons?"**

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Hiei yelled.

"Well then?"

"Oh my, mine is too hot." Hiei said.

"It's disgusting. Did you make this yourself, Kuwabara?" Yusuke asked.

"WAH!" Kuwabara cried.

"How about Keiko can go around with a head, eh?" Ibble Ibble said threateningly.

"Umm… yes mine is to hot, too?" Yusuke said in a questioning tone.

"So the bears went for a walk to let it cool off. When Red-ilocks came to the house, she went inside."

"I am hungry." Kurama said in a bored tone.

"Are we at a funeral or not?" Ibble Ibble asked.

"Hungry I am." Kurama said.

"Doesn't anyone care?" Ibble Ibble asked.

"No!" Everyone yelled.

"Just do it, because I have almighty authoress powers."

"I am hungry." Kurama said.

He walked over to table and took a bite of porridge.

"Hair…auk…gel…bleh." Kurama choked out.

"Yusuke!"

"This one is too hair gel-ish." Kurama said.

He tried the next bowl of porridge.

"It has Eikichi's hair in it." Kurama said.

"Go on." Ibble Ibble groaned.

Kurama went to Hiei's bowl of porridge.

"I feel angry at everything. I am tired so I want to sit down." Kurama said.

He walked into the living room. He saw three chairs.

"I will sit on this chair." Kurama said.

He sat down on some soap and fell off.

"Let's try the next one." Kurama said.

He sat down and got scratched by Eikichi.

"Ow, I'll try the last one." Kurama said.

He sat on it and broke it.

"Not good. I feel- slippery?" Kurama said in a questioning tone.

"Can't you read? It says 'sleepy'!"

"I feel sleepy." Kurama said.

He walked into the bedroom. He sat on the first bed (Yusuke's) and slips off.

"Ow, my butt." Kurama said.

He sat on Kuwa's bed.

"Um… more cat hair." Kurama said.

He went over to Hiei's bed.

"It's small," Kurama said while falling down, "Ow."

"And then she falls asleep and the bears come back." Ibble Ibble said quickly.

"I am starved. Let's chow down." Yusuke said.

They start to eat until they notice that some was already gone.

"Let's skip food and watch the television." Kuwabara said.

"Yeah." Yusuke said.

"HN."

They went in to see that Eikichi was terrified, Yusuke's soap was on the floor and Hiei's chair was broken.

"Umm… wah wah." Hiei said.

They walked upstairs.

"Someone has been sleeping in my bed." Yusuke said.

"Grr…" Kuwabara said in a menacing tone.

"And I HN. Why am I doing this?" Hiei asked.

"Because I said so."

"Found eat?" Hiei said in a questioning tone.

"IT, IT, and IT!"

"Yes, and it is sleeping on baby bear's bed." Yusuke snickered.

Hiei said through clenched teeth, "Let's chase it away."

Ibble Ibble finished, "They chased Kurama- I mean Red-i-locks into the distance until _she _disappeared from sight."

**THE END**

Botan: why wasn't I in the- oof! (Gets hit by the 'THE END' sign)


	2. Little Grim Riding Hood

**Little Red Riding Hood**

As everyone got their parts, they went into the costume land. Hiei walked out in his hunter suit, Botan in her red hood/robe, Yoko in a furry suit, and Genkai as the grandma. Ibble Ibble took them over to the stage, where she put on her narrarator robe, and took out her floating reader (a magical object with the ability to fly).

" Cast, please get to your stations. Bo- I mean little red riding hood, please grab your basket." Ibble Ibble yelled.

" Wee!" Botan said.

" Red went out of the house carrying her confectionary treats with her to her dear grandma, Genkai. She was getting tired of walking, so she sat down in the middle of the road, where a speeding fox almost hit her. "

" AAH!"

" Umm… yo-ung gee-rl, yo- u should wat- ch where yo-u are go-ing." He said with a bad accent.

" Cut! Can you read?" Ibble Ibble yelled.

" Yes." Yoko replied.

" Can you read American English?"

" No."

" Give him the demon script." Ibble Ibble said to the crews' shadows.

Some plushies walk in, and give him the script. He gives them his old script, and gets a piece of candy.

" That's for after. Take 2 scene 1! Action!"

" Young girl, you should watch where you're going. You look tired; I think I know a shortcut to your destination."

" I am going to the house near the lake of pretty colors." Botan replied.

" Then the shortcut is through that path on your left, but remember to make a loop at the rock just once."

" Okay!"

" So the stupid girl went to through the long way, and the fox demon went to the real shortcut, which took him directly to the house. There he went in and stuffed grandma Genkai in the closet." Ibble Ibble narrarated.

" Get me out!" Genkai yelled.

" Not by the hairs on my chinny, chin, chin!" Yoko yelled.

" That is a different story! Read off the script that says: LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD!" Ibble Ibble yelled.

" Oh. Give me your extra pair of clothes, and I will let you out."

Genkai says as she hands him clothes through crack, " Here you go. Now do as you promised, and let me out."

" Nope, I am a fox remember?"

" Hmph." Genkai says as she falls asleep.

" By the time Red arrived, she walked in and gave her 'grandmother' the treats. Then the fox used his cleverness to trick her." Ibble Ibble said.

" My, what big eyes you have." Botan said.

" All the better to see you with."

" My, what a big nose you have."

" All the better to smell you with."

" My, what big teeth you have."

" All the better to eat you with."

" AAH!"

" A hunter nearby raced in, to save Red." Ibble Ibble said.

Nothing happened.

" Today!"

" It's locked."

" Go open it, Botan."

" Okay." She replied.

" Now can you come in?" Ibble Ibble asked.

" Okay."

" He bravely ran in and saved Red from the evil fox."

" Ex-evil." Yoko yelled.

" Whatever. And captured him too."

**THE END**

Genkai: umm… can somebody get me out?


	3. Karunzel

**Karunzel**

Ibble Ibble was now handing parts out again. She gave Hiei the demon script.

" PLACES EVERYONE!" Ibble Ibble yelled.

" A hair extension! Are you crazy?" Kurama asked Ibble Ibble.

" Who told you?" Ibble Ibble whispered to Kurama.

" Umm…"

" Let's move it! Wouldn't want those cannibal reviewers eating you."

" Cannibal reviewers?" asked Hiei.

" Yep."

" Will they go away?" Kurama asked.

" Listen up! Okay… once upon a time, there was a girl named Karunzel. She-"

" Why am I a girl?"

" Because… you have the longest hair! Now, she was born into a good family, but they had to give her up in order to live."

Kuwabara and Yukina walk in and start crying.

" Dearest, er- Karunzel, we had to give you up for food, but we love you." Yukina said.

" We could have eaten her…" Kuwabara says.

" That is un-fatherly! I can't believe the nerve of you Kazuma!"

" So they squabbled on and on about being cannibals… anyway we need to get going. She was given to the evil witch, Genkai!" Ibble Ibble said.

" Uh… grr…" Genkai says unenthusiastically.

" So one day, out of the blue, Genkai said that Karunzel can't live in a house anymore."

" Why do I say that?"

" THAT'S HOW THE STORY GOES!"

" Okay… Karunzel you can't live in a house anymore."

" Where will I live, evil mother?" asked Kurama in a high voice.

" In a tall tower, and you will have to grow even longer hair! That is, so that I can reach you." Genkai said.

" So Karunzel was stored away in tall tower-" Ibble Ibble almost said.

" I sound like a box…" Kurama said.

" Until the movers came and took her away! Can I just get on with the story?"

" Fine."

" She grew her hair out and sat there singing to the birds each day. Waiting for her evil mother each time."

" Now, I sound like Yukina."

" That deeply offended me Kurama!" Yukina said.

" Please stop your bickering, so that I can get through this crazy place faster." Hiei said.

" Thank you, Hiei." Ibble Ibble said.

" Can we just go?" Genkai asked.

" Sure… One day, a prince heard her singing, and came over. When he saw that there was a tower, he waited to see if someone would come there."

" Excuse me, Ibble Ibble."

" Yes Kurama?"

" I can't get the hair extension on."

" WHAT!"

" I said-"

" I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID! I THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE KURAMA!"

" I am but-

" THE SMART GUY!"

" Can we get on with the story?" Genkai asked.

" CUT!"

Ibble Ibble walked over to Kurama and attached the hairpiece to his hair. She walked back and continued narrarating.

" He watched and saw that the witch came, said:"

" Karunzel, Karunzel, let down your long hair." Genkai said.

" And down came 30 feet of hair, and she climbed up. When she left, she jumped on her broom and flew down. So, Prince Charm-Hiei tried it the next day."

" Karunzel, Karunzel, let down your long hair." Hiei said

" Good!"

" So that I may climb, way up there."

" 30 feet of hair fell down, so then Prince Charm-Hiei climbed up the hair."

" Who are you, sir?" Kurama asks.

" I am-" Hiei coughs.

" Genkai, can demons get sick?"

" YES, DIMWIT!" Genkai shouts.

" Hiei, do you have a cold?"

" Yes."

" And… YOU DIDN"T TELL ME! I could've called Yusuke to play Prince Charming!"

" Oops."

" Go on."

" I am Prince Charm-Hiei."

" Does evil mother know of your existence?" Kurama asked.

" No."

" We must leave. Now."

" Why?"

" Follow me."

" Karunzel and Prince Charm-Hiei tried jumping down the tower, but they got caught. The witch sent Charm-Hiei to a town 3 miles east, and cut Karunzel's hair." Ibble Ibble said.

" Why evil mother, Why?" Kurama asked.

" I felt like it."

" Could you get the extension off?"

" Sure."

" OW!"

" He he he!"

" I will find Prince Charm-Hiei! If it's the last thing I do!"

" Karunzel ran three miles to find that Prince Charm-Hiei was waiting for her. She ran to him and they got married, to live happily ever after." Ibble Ibble concluded.

**THE END**

" I divorce, Kazuma!" Yukina said.

" Fine. Then me and my army of psychic, kid eating people will go on with out you!" Kuwabara said.


	4. Sleeping Handsome

Essence of Good and Evil: due to a minor incident, Ibble Ibble and Kurama will not be in for the next three chappies…

Yusuke: is this an omen?

Essence of Good and Evil: NO! Mua ha ha ha ha ha!

**Sleeping Handsome**

" Why me!" Yusuke asks.

" Because you questioned me!" Essence said.

" But-"

" NO!"

" Why do I have to play the part of a boy?" Botan asks.

" I felt like doing it."

" But-"

" NOOOO!"

" Fine."

" Get in your positions everyone! It starts now!"

Yusuke, Hiei, and Jin get on stage.

" Once upon a time, there was a birth in the kingdom of Blah."

" That's not how story go!" Jin said.

" That is how I will tell it!"

" I liked Ibble Ibble better, even if she is in the mental-" Hiei began.

" SHUSH! Now she was blessed with all sorts of gifts, except the one where she would fall asleep for one hundred years if she where to be pricked by a spinning wheel. "

" I order all spinning wheels to be destroyed!" Hiei said.

" All but one was destroyed. On her sixteenth birthday, she went up a tower and met an old woman."

" Hello old hag- I mean miss old hag." Yusuke said.

" I will teach you to spin, Princess dimwit." Genkai said harshly.

" Whatever." Yusuke said.

" She walked over there carefully." Essence said as Yusuke tripped. " Then she fell and pricked her finger on the needle."

" Can't reach needle…" Yusuke said. "Done."

" She fell asleep and slept for 100 years." Essence sees Yusuke on the floor really asleep. " Uh… Yusuke? This was supposed to be pretend."

" NO! NO! NO! " Yusuke sleep yelled.

" Anyway, a prince decided to come to try and wake her. Her- er- his name was Prince Charm Botan. "

" I, Prince Charm Botan, shall wake her up. I will go and kiss her now." Botan said.

" He ran up the tower, and knelt down beside her. Then he kissed her-"

" That's gross!"

" DO IT!"

"NO."

" YES."

" NOOOOO!"

" NOOOO!"

" YES!"

" Reverse psychology always works."

" Then he kissed her. After that she woke up."

" EWW! Botan germs!"

" Then they lived happily ever after, the end."

**THE END**

Ibble Ibble: Kurama! I'm not crazy!

Kurama: you just don't want to admit it! I am taking you to therapy!

Ibble Ibble: No, notthe therapist!


	5. Kuwabara the Ugly Person

Essence: seems like Ibble Ibble could make it in to the next chappie… do you think that I own Yu Yu Hakusho? I don't! Kuwabara bashing is involved.

**Kuwabara, the Ugly Person**

Kuwabara ran into Essence because of his excitement. She slapped him, and stuck tape on his script, and then she attached it to his head over his face. She quickly walked over to the costume area to get the others.

" We're on in -1!" Essence yelled.

Hiei ran out of the costume half-dressed in a feathery tunic. He was wearing webbed shoes too. Yusuke and Botan ran out too in the same garb. Kuwabara was in a poncho with feathers and scuba flippers. Essence grabbed Ibble Ibble's floating script thing.

" Once upon a time, there was a family of people dressed in duck suits. The ugliest boy in the ugliest suit was always left out of everything."

" Can I play with you?" Kuwabara asked.

" Your suit makes me want to barf." Botan said.

" Can I play with you, Yusuke?"

" I would die from your ugliness."

" One day, the family went on a vacation to the swamp. They left Kuwabara there while he was sleeping the next day. He sprang to his feet after realizing what was going on."

" Guys! Where are you?"

" He ran to the swamp waters and lived for 5 years there, hoping for his family to return. After many years, he had gone from ugly to uglier. He was so ugly that it killed everything there, and he died from starvation."

" What!"

" Do you wish me to repeat it? I said 'He ran to the swamp waters and lived for 5 years there, hoping for his family to return. After many years, he had gone from ugly to uglier. He was so ugly that it killed everything there, and he died from starvation.' Got it?"

" That ain't how the story goes!" Botan yelled.

" 1: where did you get the southern accent, 2: that ain't how life goes!"

" So?" Yusuke replied.

Essence went over to Yusuke, and tackled him to the ground. He was thus wrapped in a straight jacket by Essence's author powers. Everyone got upset over this, so from afar the room looked like feathers, dust, and arm and legs. The door slammed open, and Ibble Ibble was there at the door next to Kurama. Ibble Ibble ran over to Essence, and shook her back to her senses.

" What the heck went on here?"

" Work, the usual."

" Oh, carry on."

" Ibble Ibble! I thought that we made a deal!" Kurama shouted.

" When was this?"

" At the institute!"

" What institute?" Ibble Ibble replied with a smirk.

" AAH!"

" Essence! That ain't how the story goes! Where did you learn childhood stories from?" Botan yelled.

" My sink."

" Okaay… and what about you Ibble Ibble?"

" I didn't learn very many, and from the floor at my pre-school!" She said with a smile.

" What! How did you pass kindergarten?"

" I used my head."

" And you Essence?"

" I'm ashamed to admit it, but I passed using my head…" Essence said with a pout/smile.

" Argh! You are driving me nuts!"

" That's kinda what I'm supposed to do. It's my job."

" Mine too."

" Can I get this suit off? Please?" Hiei pleaded.

" I didn't finish the story! His habitat was slowly destroyed by his corpse, thus causing more global warming. Eventually, the ozone layer left us, and killed us all. The End."

" Good! I'm rubbing off on you!"

" Not good." Hiei muttered.

**The End**

Hiei :Can someone help me get this off? Please? Anyone there!


	6. Kuwasel and Yukitel

Ibble Ibble: Thanks to Essence of Good and Evil for letting me put you in, and thanks Mikobunny for helping me proofread.

**Kuwabara and Yukina**

Ibble Ibble was handing out the parts again, and she was instructing everyone into their costumes. Kurama, yet again a victim of cruel fate, was playing the part of the step-mom. Hiei was going to be the dad, and Yukina was going to be the girl. Kuwabara was going to be the boy.

"Once upon a time, there was a poor family that lived in the woods. They had so little, they sometimes couldn't eat. The parents got together one night, in their rooms." Ibble Ibble narrarated.

"Why don't we leave them in the woods tomorrow? Surely they both will starve before they reach anywhere." Kurama said in an extremely high voice.

"Sure, who cares?" Hiei said.

"STOP! Hiei, you're the loving father. You aren't supposed to let him- err, her do that to

Kuwa-sel and Yuki-tel!" Ibble Ibble yelled.

"So?" Hiei replied.

"Well," Ibble Ibble paused, "Well, what about Yukina. Do you want her to be stuck in the woods with him?"

"Fine, be that way. Don't do it." Hiei replied.

"Meanwhile, Kuwa-sel and Yuki-tel were hiding out in the hallway next to the door." Ibble Ibble said.

"Don't worry, my love-" Kuwabara began.

"Yuki-tel! Yuki-tel!" Ibble Ibble yelled.

"Do we have to do it the regular way?" Kuwabara whined.

"How else would we do it?"

"The happy way!" Yukina and Kuwabara cheered.

"WHAT!"

"By singing, we can portray the story!"

"I can't believe that she's your sister." Kurama whispered to Hiei.

"It was hard for me to believe that too." Hiei muttered back.

Kuwabara and Yukina started to dance. They danced to bed and sung the letter 'Z' all night. In the morning, Kurama and Hiei grabbed Kuwabara and Yukina and they took them to the woods. Yukina dropped cookies as they went along. Kurama swiftly ran off before they could do anything. Hiei was…um…

"HIEI!" Ibble Ibble yelled.

Hiei snored.

"Yukina, you were supposed to drop bread crumbs!" Ibble Ibble yelled.

"Cookies taste better!" Yukina snapped.

"Why couldn't you just break up the cookies then?"

"They wouldn't taste good then…"

"They aren't supposed to taste good!"

"Then how would the birdies come to eat them?"

Just then, vultures swoop down and pick up Kurama. They fly off with him, and thena vulture comes back and eats all the cookies. Everyone stared up.

"What just happened?" Hiei asked.

"That is when the author can't concentrate because of something walking on the keyboard… Or, I think the story just ended." Ibble Ibble said.

"That works!" Kuwabara sang off key.

"What will we do now?" Hiei asked.

"I know, for the next story, Hiei will narrarate." Ibble Ibble said.

* * *

Ibble Ibble: sorry, this chappie was short. I honestly didn't even know that Hansel and Gretel existed until 4th grade. It was hard writing what I didn't know… 


End file.
